Have you ever wondered why life seems so much more manageable for some people than others, even when their circumstances are similar? Let’s face it, life is rarely as easy as we would like it to be and coping with life’s ups and downs requires a fair amount of resiliency. So, how do you develop resiliency?
By resiliency, I am referring to the cognitive, emotional and relational skills needed to face challenges and even grow from the process. It is a topic about which I have written several articles. Building Resiliency requires shifting mindsets and developing and practicing new skills. Here are eight different practices you can consider that can cultivate your personal resiliency. ( I have included the links to the full articles.)
1. Practice patience: Patience is the deep breath between situation and response. It allows you to be deliberate instead of impulsive. But like all resiliencies it takes practice. Here are four helpful things to do while being patient.
2. Learn how to bounce back: Life is full of complications, disappointments and flops. Anyone who has ever tried anything has experienced an occasional stumbling block. Resilient people manage to persevere and bounce back from adversity.
3. Improve critical thinking: Our brain is designed to generalize and assimilate new information into what we already think we know. Unfortunately, this can result in a bias that can hinder our decisions and responses. Cultivating a resiliency towards brain bias takes skill and practice. Here are seven ways to improve your critical thinking skills.
4. Understand your emotions: Resilient people don’t avoid emotion. They understand that they are an important part of the human experience. They feel them and face them without letting them dictate their response. Here are some tips to help you better understand the role of emotions.
5. Exercise flexible thinking: This ability to think flexibly while problem solving is an essential skill in resilient people. It requires practice to look at things from a different perspective, but sometimes this is exactly what is needed. Here are four ideas to practice.
6. Express gratitude: The practice of gratitude has been shown to improve our well-being and shift our perception. Gratitude is a resiliency that can be developed, and it involves cultivating a habit through practice. Here are a few things to try.
7. Develop boundaries: Relationships are a fundamental part of being human. We are wired to connect with each other as a source of both healing and survival. Developing and communicating clear boundaries improves our relationships, facilitates functioning and increases the ability to navigate conflict. Learn more about this important resiliency.
8. Stay connected: Social connectivity is both a powerful resiliency and a life sustaining survival response. There are many ways to stay connected and cultivate this essential resiliency. Here are a few ideas.
Although, none of the above practices will result in a life without difficulty. Developing resiliency can help us navigate the challenging times and even become better for the experience.
To learn more about compassion fatigue and how to build resiliency in individuals and organizations, check out my book The Compassion Fatigued Organization: Restoring Compassion to Helping Professionals.